Wednesday, 8 February 2017

What I Missed

Emotionally, I'm in a transitional time in my life right now. You can tell by the fact that I'm talking about myself in this blog when I should be talking about something important. For example.

CMT is going big with Nashville -- Did you know that CMT is the only music channel owned by Viacom that actually gives a fuck about music? Don't let Party Down South fool you, mainly because that show is finally finished. The secret is that CMT has shifted towards country lifestyle programming and programs related in someway or form to music. The current lineup is a lot more coherent, but it hasn't translated into good enough ratings. With the arrival of Nashville, the success of Still The King, the newly rebranded CMT Music, an new on-air graphic refresh (that looks oddly similar to graphics for CMT Canada's music blocks), and MTV and VH1 abandoning their music video blocks, it looks like CMT is done playing games.

Oxygen shifting towards crime programming -- Of course I didn't know about this until after I started working on "Oxygen's New Reality Show", but it looks like NBC is tempting fate with their women's networks again. It's not really must-see television, but Snapped is one of Oxygen's longest-running original series and a staple on C-list networks like LMN and ReelzChannel. Oxygen has built a crime block centered around the series and, since launch, has seen better numbers that what its other shows were getting. Thus, with the help of Dick "Law and Order" Wolf, Oxygen will rebrand this summer as a crime-themed network.

I don't blame the network's fans/viewers/people-who-still-give-a-shit-about-this-wannabe-Lifetime if they're worried. It was good move to kill Style Network in favor of the male-targeting Esquire Network, but I would have never known that the new network would end up being even worse than Style. That the ratings at launch were nonexistant should have been a red flag, but when the original programming have as much attention as grass growing versus retro television shows, Ninja Warrior, and syndicated crime dramas that are already airing on USA Network (and Syfy), you just know that Esquire Network will go down as one of the biggest screw-ups NBCUniversal has ever made.

I'll talk shit about Bell Media until the world ends, but at least they aren't as hyper-incompetent as the clowns running this conglomerate.

Turner's cable networks are airing fewer commercials during original programming -- 'Nuff said.

Impact Wrestling has a new logo -- ...And it looks like the logo of my public school basketball team. I'd comment on Impact bringing back the repetitive "Sinister Rise Above" theme, Anthem's plans to retire the TNA name, or talk more shit about Teru Mikami's favorite angle, but I'm still waiting on Lucha Underground to return from haitus. I got a bad feeling that it will be a LONG wait. Speaking of long waits, where the hell is GFW's TV show!?

I'm reading superhero comics now -- You can thank DC Rebirth, Young Animal, and Dynamite for that.

Amazon Prime Video is now in Canada! -- And, at the moment, it looks like Crackle with mainstream TV shows. At least it's cheaper than Prime in the U.S, but I'd say you should wait a few months before you commit to a yearly subscription.

Cooking Channel is now in Canada! -- Because that's what this country needs, another damn food network!

Vintage TV in now in Canada! -- Because this is what the country REALLY needs, another network that actually cares about music.

American Dad on MuchMusic -- Because at this point, Canadian program rights are bullshit!

I'm done, that's all I can muster up. Maybe I'll go into detail later in the year. But for now, Happy Birthday to me.




Saturday, 21 January 2017

The Rant I Posted on YTV's Facebook Page (Because Anime Fans Are Annoying)

People, Bionix is never coming back!

I know it's lame that YTV has become totally worthless post 9pm, but Canadian cable in general has become more dependent on ratings and demographics. Why do you think there are so many lifestyle/entertainment/whatever networks aimed at women?

YTV gave up teenage/adult programming to ABC Spark Canada and Teletoon at Night, and even then the target audience is probably spending more time watching YouTube videos or Netflix. The only reason anyone over the age of 13 even bothers watching YTV anymore is for whatever show Nickelodeon is shilling out anyways (i.e The Loud House, Harvey Beaks).

More importantly, in case you still haven't noticed, anime is not, nor will it ever be, mainstream entertainment. The general population in North America care more about the latest video game or comic book then some "Japanese cartoon". Even adults in Japan expect kids to "grow out of it" at a certain age.

The ultimate reason for why Toonami was brought back wasn't just for nostalgia. Adult Swim is one of the few networks that "get" anime, (even if it doesn't always get them ratings) and figured it would be better to use a brand that every anime fan in the U.S would recognize, when [as] itself is better known for American cartoons. Bionix is nowhere near as popular as Toonami is or ever was.

Finally, why waste your time relying on cable television at all, let alone a cable network for CHILDREN?

Be realistic.

Sunday, 15 January 2017

Is Disney XD the New Cartoon Network?

...Of course not! The whole reason for all of Cartoon Network's stupid decisions is that animation alone doesn't get ratings, or at least, it won't get the same ratings as Nickelodeon or Disney Channel. But screw the both of them. If there's one thing I learned from covering television its that quality programming is more important than having a high-rated show, especially since Netflix doesn't worry too much about streaming numbers when deciding to renew a show.

Ratings doesn't matter if your show sucks ass!

But I digress, as far as animation goes, Disney XD might as well be the new Cartoon Network. I've already talked about how they've really turned themselves around as far as anime goes. I'll take the localized version of Doraemon over the poor treatment they gave Naruto Shippudden anyday of the week.

Though, in hindsight, maybe it was for the best if cable networks left that show alone. At least Part I's adaption had the excuse of waiting on the next story arc to finish for its unnecessarily long block of filler episodes at the end. Shippudden has no excuse. Its recent novel adaptions are nothing more than a deliberate attempt to pad out the show, cheapening a once decent adaption of the manga to levels on par with Pokemon's anime.

But I'm going off topic again.

Of course we know the success of Gravity Falls and Star Wars Rebels, the first and foremost reasons for anyone to watch Disney XD, has inspired the network to become more creative with their cartoons. Shows like Star and the Forces of Evil are great in their own right and have gained a fanbase beyond their target audience. Then again, Disney XD is aimed at preteen boys, whereas Nick is aimed at children and Cartoon Network has become a vector for shows that only the network likes or gets high-enough ratings.

Hence, Disney XD can be blamed for Counterfeit Cat and Atomic Puppet, aka the best shows Teletoon has put out in a LONG time and Everyone is looking for to the reboot of DuckTales and a new animated series inspired by Big Hero 6.

But the two shows that I'm keeping my eye on are Marvel's Spider-Man and Man of Action's new Mega Man show. Not much is known about the new Spider-Man series, except that it won't be a continuation of Ultimate Spider-Man and it will feature Spider-Gwen, Miles Morales, and Venom.

In contrast, Man of Action, who were also responsible for US-M, gave too much information about their new Mega Man show. It's aimed at 6 year olds, it's got "over-the-top humor", he goes to school, and he has a new sidekick named "Mega Mini". ...Good thing I'm more of Crash Bandicoot fan.

Ultimately, it's the improvement's made to their live-action slate that's really got me impressed. Those cookie-cutter sitcoms are finally in the background where they belong, and in their place are shows that do things a little differently. Kirby Buckets is yet another attempt at making a live-action/2D animated hybrid show that, predictably, has both fans and detractors. In contrast, Mech-X4 has took all the action and darker elements from comedies like Lab Rats and Mighty Med and turned it into a giant robot show. Both shows are a wonderful change of pace regardless of critical reception, and I look forward to Disney XD doing more shows like this in the future.

With a strong slate of both live-action and animated series, Disney XD might not have more viewers than Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network, but it sure as hell blows the water out of the both of them. The best part is that, because it's been overshadowed by its once boy-slanted knock-off, Disney Channel is trying their best to produce more decent programming from now on. ...Trying, they still suck ass, but at least they're trying.

That's all I can ask for.

Wednesday, 11 January 2017

You Can't Beat MTV, and You Can't Replace Machinima.com (Nor Should You)

There once was a website called machinination. One of its admins had the nerve to call the third Hot Pursuit game garbage, just because it was a dolled up Burnout game, rather than aknowledging that it was a good game its own right.

Fuck him and fuck that website. I hope it burns in hell.

...Don't look at me like that, you don't even read this blog.

...OK, fine. I act my age for a second.

Do you know why MTV is still considered the number one music network, even though they only do the bare minimum of ACTUAL music television? Its because music television doesn't bring in ratings, not when its widely available on the internet. Its because MTV ISN'T a music network anymore, no matter how much they pretend to give a damn and no matter how much hipsters and rock fans whine and beg for them to play more music. MTV is popular because they're more, for lack of a better term, diversity than other networks. ...Or, you know, they used to be.

From the beginning Machinination was narrow-minded. To them, the only machinima that mattered were those made with first-person shooters like Halo. The persecption is that since FPS machinima requires that you work with other people for character movement, whearas Smash Bros machinima can be done by one person doing almost all the work, that Smash Bros doesn't even count as actual machinima.

However, there's no denying that there is a demand for music television. It's the very same audience that wants YTV to air Dragon Ball Kai even though the network is WAY past the point of appealing to teenagers. Its the same audience that has become as immature as Sonic fanboys because of Syfy's poorly handled rebrand and subsequent programming shift.

But in the end, we don't have to rely on ratings-driven cable networks to get the shows that deserve our time. And I sure as hell didn't need some stupid forum nor some juvinile MCN to find other makers or get some exposure for myself. You just need to know where to look.

Smash machinima is still being made today and the tools being used to make them require a lot more work than just recuriting body actors. Look past the low-res Brawl machinima lingering on the in-name-only Machinima network and you will find videos that will change your perception on what a Smash Bros macinima is. And no, I'm not just talking about Smash King.

They don't get much views, especilly compared to GMOD movies or SFM videos. Then again, machinima as a whole was never made for the purpose of popularity.

Neither was this blog post.

Thursday, 15 December 2016

CN Red

Right now, Cartoon Network is getting the hype train going for the long-awaited premiere of Justice League Action. The show will premiere on Friday, December 16, but after that, new episodes will air on Saturday mornings starting December 24. ...Yep, just Saturday mornings; no timeslot indicated.

Already we're assuming that the show, whether or not it's good, will be buried in the same 6-8am graveyard slot that Cartoon Network gave to Pokemon, Transformers and Sonic Boom. Furthermore, we can also assume that CN won't be promoting the show anytime soon. We assume this because that's how bad Cartoon Network has become; that we can already assume the worst and never expect any better.

Nickelodeon has been much more merciful with the shows they've screwed over than the critics give them credit for.

They buried Invader Zim, but because of its MASSIVE fanbase, it still appears in video games and survived long enough to spawn an ongoing comic book series. The Legend of Korra was expanded into a full series, but was constantly moving on the schedule. That Nickelodeon decided to move the final Book online, as opposed to outright cancelling the show, shows that they aren't foolish enough to completely scrap one of the best animated series they've put out since the original Avatar.

Finally, I wouldn't worry too much about the piss-poor treatment Nick's been giving to Harvey Beaks, because The Fairly Oddparents has gotten even worse treatment. It seems even Nickelodeon doesn't like how badly that show has jumped the shark. Despite being the second-longest running show on the network, it doesn't even get half of the airtime Spongebob Squarepants gets. In the end, just because the network renewed a show, doesn't mean they have to air it...on their main channel.

Didn't Cartoon Network have their own secondary network? What the hell happened to Boomerang? Are you telling me they can air reruns of Teen Titans Go, because the airtime on Cartoon Network wasn't good enough, but not have time to air the shows that actually need more exposure? How convenient it is for the new Boomerang to be targeted towards kids, families, and girls, as opposed to the supposedly more boy-slanted network that shares channel space with Adult Swim.

Speaking of, notice how Adult Swim's upcoming slate of animated programming has gotten the internet all fired up. [as] is making twelve new episodes of their favorite anime, FLCL, they're bringing back Samurai Jack for a fifth season, and not only have they just announced Funimation's dub of Dragon Ball Super this past week, but also the long-rumored dub of Dragon Ball Kai: The Final Chapters. All airing inside Toonami, which Adult Swim also brought back to let viewers know, "Yes, we still air mature animation." But the one show that everyone is talking about, more than anything on Toonami, is Rick and Morty and its long-awaited third season. I don't need to say anything about that show other than it being the benchmark for what a modern adult animated comedy should be like.

The ONE program Cartoon Network got a lot of positive feedback for in 2016 never aired on the network, it was uploaded to their YouTube channel. Breathe it in people, because the internet is the only place you're gonna find truly modern animation like that. That's not to say shows like We Bare Bears or The Amazing World of Gumball are terrible, but they are leagues above Teen Titans Go and everything else the network has churned out as of late. And yet, they've also been pushed to the side for juvenile comedies that only exist to get ratings and sell toys.

Once again, Cartoon Network has let its envy of the better-rated Nickelodeon and Disney Channel usher in a new dark age, not only where ratings dictate programming, but where shows have to be "appropriate for kids". I still think Cartoon Network's fanboys are nostalgic man-children and animation snobs, but I can't blame them and I feel their frustration. I fear Cartoon Network is about to become to animation, what MTV has become to music.

Irrelevant.

Saturday, 3 December 2016

Update: December 2016

Writing this post on a phone so screw gramar

Getting a new computer because i hate my old one. Slow, laggy. Need more powerful machine.

Backing up everything to cloud and portable hard drive in preperation for the move.

Power cord broken; using phone app for now.

No, Reycralibur will not return this year.

I hate my life.

Sunday, 20 November 2016

The People vs Adult Swim?

You gotta believe someone in America is hoping this will be the anti-Boston bomb scare that animation fans have been waiting for since Snyder came to power at Cartoon Network.

So, there's this show on Adult Swim called Million Dollar Extreme Presents:World Peace. I never watched it, I figured it was just more of the same surreal humor [as] runs on. However, in the wake of Donald Trump becoming president, the seedy background of Sam Hyde, one of MDE's members, has been cause for alarm among the network's creative talent.

I won't bore you with the details because there is a shit ton of articles on Buzzfeed about this. Long story short, Hyde's anti-comedy has made him a favorite among the scummy, pro-white, bastards that partied like no tomorrow when Donald Trump was voted in. As such, [as] creators are calling for World Peace to be cancelled, on the grounds that it basically promotes hate speech. Just for the hell of it, they also complain about the lack of female creators, of which network head Mike Lazzo didn't really good job defending himself in that regard. If anything, the success of Full Frontal on sister network TBS just elevates that complaint.

But don't get distracted from the important issue here. Adult Swim's modus operandi is to buck the mainstream and give a voice to the voiceless. None of the original shows they air would have been given a shot on any other network. Case and point, Metalocalypse was never revived after Adult Swim cancelled it. One series finale was all the fans wanted, but they never got it because it was too expensive.

So coming off of that, you can imagine someone who isn't a terrible person is hoping [as] keeps World Peace on the air. What kind of message would be sent if [as] sent ANOTHER show off the air, not because of money, but because someone didn't like the people who made it. As a Cartoon Network spin-off, you can imagine the kind of bullshit that happens when someone in power doesn't like a show and tries to bury it. They can play affirmative action card if they want, because I too believe there exists a women who loves making shows about sex and violence for women who love sex and violence just as much as I love sex and violence. That's not what this is about, nor is it about Donald Trump sending social conventions back to the stone age.

To me, this is an issue of censorship.

As I've said, I don't really care about this show. In fact, outside of The Eric Andre Show, Black Jesus, or maybe Dream Corp, LLC, I actually don't care too much for any live-action show on the network. Adult Swim is low-budget, so you can understand how cartoon admirers like myself feel about the network spending the very same resources that could have been used to give Metalocalypse its well-deserved sendoff on live-action shows. You can also imagine the frustration of longtime network fans since adult animation, the very thing Adult Swim was built to bring prominence to, has been downplayed. English-dubbed anime has been pushed back to late Saturday nights for nothing except FOX sitcom reruns. Finally, with TBS looking for more edgier comedies and TruTV stretching their legs; Adult Swim's continued ventures into live-action comedy look redundant.

However, this is all a matter of opinion. Unlike Hardig, who worked on another live-action show I don't care for, I'm not gonna call for the cancellation of a show simply because I don't like the people who made it (nor because I want Adult Swim to air something besides American Dad reruns). In fact, I encourage Adult Swim to renew the show for another season, because it's cancellation for this reason is nothing short of hypocritical for people who despise those racist, sexist, Trump supporters yet at the same would deny these idiots the right to spew their crap.

It's a little something called freedom of speech, and it is a blessing as it is a curse.